TV Tues - Hopelessly Devoted

Been a little too busy to get totally caught up on everything (Monday nights are way too chock full of good TV and activities), but here's what's been watched and deemed comment-worthy.

Monday Oct. 8

Chuck (NBC 7:00): Still my favorite show of the new season; glad to see that they're finally done with all the set-up and are now ready to head into the Villain-of-the-Week stuff.

Journeyman (NBC 8:00): There are parts of this show that I'm really enjoying, and then parts that drive me crazy. The fact that he never presses very hard for information from former fiance and fellow time traveler about why they are the way they are: frustrating.

Tuesday Oct. 9

Reaper (CW 8:00): After what struck me as a trifle forced and overcrowded pilot, the second and third episodes of the series have lived up to the rave reviews it's been receiving. I am now officially on board for the long haul.

Wednesday Oct. 10

Pushing Up Daisies (ABC 7:00): So, I went into the second ep with my expectations set at a slightly different level, and for the first 15-20 minutes I was still not quite into it. But then we had the sequence with the Japanese businessfolk which made me smile, followed quickly by the Dandelion model hunkered over behind the car and crabwalking on the rotating dias as she ate the pie which made me laugh out loud, which was soon followed by Kristen Chenowith in a scene which made me think "that is one of the most awesome things I've ever seen.*"



Sure, there were some plot holes, and the stylized nature takes some getting used to, but that scene right there has earned Pushing Daisies a place in my heart**.

Private Practice (ABC 8:00): This one was a bit hit or miss for me; most of the "miss" scenes were ones focusing on Addison, while the "hit" scenes featured Cooper and Violet, which is turning out to be a pattern. My favorite line of the episode came from Naomi, however: "This boy's baking cakes at me!"

Thursday Oct. 11

My Name is Earl (NBC 7:00): One of the nice things about Earl is that it even if they do decide to have Earl serve out the full jail sentence instead of springing him with some deus ex machina, it can easily avoid falling into a jailhouse rut by dint of flashback episodes such as this.

Survivor (CBS 7:00): Extremely glad to see crazy Dave gone; let's hope the voting out of annoying cast members trend continues. Of course, with the high percentage of annoying cast members remaining, it would almost be hard not to.

The Office (NBC 8:00): Several great moments in this ep: Pam and Jim's pranking of Dwight, the office members obsessed with the DVD screen, the whole office's reaction to the pizza announcement (especially Kevin's "It tastes like hot circles of garbage"), Meredith wanting Jim to sign her cast . . . all comedy gold. But nothing beats the sheer awesomeness of Andy wooing Angela with Abba's "Take a Chance on Me" while backed up by two friends on speaker-phone -- greatness, pure greatness.

Grey's Anatomy (ABC 8:00): Good-bye, Really Old Guy; we hardly knew ye. Christina's manipulation of Meredith was fun, and pretty much every scene with Bailey was gold, as usual. The previews for this weeks ep that show Izzy getting ready for fisticuffs with Callie just made me cringe, however.

MONDAY Oct 15

How I Met Your Mother (CBS 7:00): The mini-Barneys were great, as was Barney's Machiavellian plan to win The Game.

Big Bang Theory (CBS 7:30): Man, they're bringing in all the Roseanne alums, aren't they? I'm hoping John Goodman or Sarah Chalke are next on the list. As for the episode itself, Sheldon continues to be the highlight of the show.

Two and a Half Men (CBS 8:00): The return of Rose! Too bad Drive had to be canceled in order for it to happen. Here's hoping it's not a one-off appearance.

Heroes (NBC 8:00): Okay, the big reveal that Parkman's dad was one of the Nine; took me by surprise. The reveal that he was also the Nightmare Man; not so much. Interesting that Sylar is going by Gabriel again; I wonder if that has any significance other than him just feeling lost. Also enjoyed watching Micah's cousin discover her Taskmaster-esque photographic reflexes.




*A scene I'm sure several other people saw as "The moment the show lost all appeal."
**Even if it did get "Hopelessly Devoted" stuck in my head for the rest of the week.

Movie Mon. - A Smattering of Horror

Very little movie watching got done this week due to trying to stay current on TV viewage, attending the State Fair, working out, physical therapy, roomies' softball games, etc. So here are the two whole movies I was able to watch this past week.

Flight of the Living Dead: Outbreak on a Plane: Low budget horror flick whose tongue may not have been firmly planted in cheek, but it definitely poked itself over to the side from time to time. Some characters entertained me (the fed and his prisoner, the stewardesses), some annoyed me (the golfer's wife, the head scientist, the jocks and their vapid girlfriends), but overall the film just left me cold; it's almost as if all the wit the writers had was wasted on the title.

1408: Director's Cut: Adaptation of a Stephen King story about a man who makes his living writing about haunted vacation spots even though he doesn't believe in the supernatural -- up until he checks into the malevolent room 1408 of the Dolphin Hotel, that is. The bulk of the movie is John Cusack talking to himself as he tries to cope with the strange occurrences in the room; in the hands of a lesser actor this might have made the movie unwatchable, but Cusack's charisma and skill propelled the movie along just fine. One of the better horror movies I've seen recently. In the interest of padding today's woefully short post, there are three things in particular I'd like to comment on, for three, as you know, is the magic number. Oh yes it is; it's the magic number. Just ask School House Rock if you don't believe me.

But I digress.

1. The version we watched was the director's cut with "alternate ending." After looking up the details of the theatrical ending, may I just say that I am extremely glad we got to watch the version we did; it appears that the original ending was replaced at the theaters because test audiences said it was "too much of a downer." And, heaven forbid a horror movie not have a sugar-coated, "they all lived happily after" ending, right? *sigh*
2. During the mind games the room was playing on Cusack, The Lovable PigPen, prompted, one assumes, but a sort of professional respect for a fellow force for evil, repeatedly commented "Oh, the room is goooooood! I like this room!" However, there was one moment which even PigPen admitted was a step to far; I guess the fictional hotel room wins the "who's more evil?" contest.
3. Every time Samuel L. Jackson appeared on screen, I was waiting for him to scream "I'm tired of these [expletive deleted] ghosts in this [expletive deleted] room!" Although that never happened, Mr. Jackson did get to drop at least one f-bomb, I believe, which makes me wonder if he has now made that a part of his contract, and if letting him have a purple lightsaber was the only way Lucas could get him to waive that clause for the Star Wars prequels.

Guess Which Two of the Seven Dwarves I Am*

You know what I'd like? I'd like for my body to respond to my going to bed an hour earlier than usual as an opportunity to get an hour more rest, instead of just waking me up an hour before my alarm clock goes off. That would be nice.

*And no, PigPen, Dopey is not an option

It Puts the Lotion on Its Skin, In Hopes Its Finger Will Bend Again

For the next few weeks I'll be doing physical therapy for my finger Tuesday and Thursday afternoons after I get off of work. My initial evaluation was a couple of days ago, at which point I discovered that my recovering middle finger is about 1 cm bigger in diameter than the other middle finger. I also had confirmed that I haven't quite regained full range of motion in the ring and pinky fingers of the same hand, although their slight resistance to full motion is only a matter of a few degrees, whereas the big troublemaker has between 60-70 degrees of improvement before it's close to being normal* again.

To facilitate this, I've been given a series of exercises to do three to four times a day. First there is a series of stretches at the joints; I'm supposed to start out doing sets of 10, and then work my way up. Next, there is the "tendon glide" exercise, which resembles this image


except my instructions were to go A-D-A-B-A-E-A-C, all of which counts as one rep. I'm also supposed to apply copious amounts of hand lotion in order to massage the area around the scar for about 3-4 minutes 3-4 times a day in order to flatten out and break up the scar tissue. Then, once an hour I'm supposed to raise my hand above my head an open and close it in order to get the blood pumping and reduce swelling; three to four times a day I'm supposed to follow this up by propping my elbow on a towel, applying more hand lotion and massaging from my fingertip down to my forearm for 3-4 minutes, which is also supposed to help with improving circulation and reducing swelling. Sounds like a blast, huh?

My second appointment is this afternoon; we'll see much progress has been made in the whole two days since I started.

*Normal

TV Tues - Revising Expectations

Finally starting to get a little caught up, although there are still a couple of shows I'm lagging behind on.

FRIDAY SEPT. 28

Moonlight (CBS 8:00): First of all, whatever genius at CBS's advertising department decided to market this as a show about a type of hero you've never seen before needs to be tied down and forced to watch every single episode of Forever Knight and Angel until they're finally willing to admit that, honestly, vampire detective? Not necessarily "original." Outside of that, I liked Jason Dohring as the baby-faced capitalistic vampire mentor, and thought that the female lead was likable. Not too keen on the main character as of yet (kind of bland in a brooding avenger of the night sort of way), but maybe that will change with time. Of course, that's assuming I stick with it long enough to find out . . .

MONDAY OCT. 1

Chuck (NBC 7:00): Still my favorite new show of the season; the fast food fist fight between the warring agents was quite possibly the highlight of my TV watching week. Could have done without the awkward dinner party sequence, but I can forgive one small stumble in an otherwise entertaining show.

Journeyman (NBC 9:00): Finally got a chance to watch the first two epsiodes which turned out to be a lot more entertaining than I had predicted from the previews. The twist of having him miss out on huge portions of his current life due to his new powers does add some interesting tension, although his wife's reactions in the pilot really bugged me -- honestly, when your husband shows up after two days and says he can't remember where he's been, wouldn't a more compassionate, loving response be "Honey, let's get you to a doctor and make sure there's not something wrong" instead of her oh-so-sweet "Well, at least you could have called!" Sheesh. I just want to know how long it is before someone actually sees him disappear.

TUESDAY OCT. 2

Cavemen (ABC 7:00): Not as catastrophically awful as I had feared, but in no way, shape, or form does it qualify as "good."

Carpoolers (ABC 7:30): Oh, Fred Goss, how far you have fallen; couple of mildly amusing moments, but probably not going to make it onto my watch list.

WEDNESDAY OCT. 3

Pushing Daisies (ABC 7:00): See, you'd think by now I would have learned not to get my expectations up too high. My biggest issue with the pilot stemmed from the fact that I went in expecting this to have the same dark, cynical, snarky sensibility as Dead Like Me and Wonderfalls, and instead found myself immersed in a bright and shiny fairy tale. Sure, there's a bit of an edge hiding there, what with all the death and murder and such, but the overall perkiness of the characters threw me for a loop.

Private Practice (ABC 8:00): Muuuuuuuuuuuuuuch better second episode; sure, Addison getting all bent out of shape at Tim Daly (yeah, I still have no clue what his character's name is, and I"m too lazy to look it up on IMDB right now) was stupid, but overall the characters were much more likable this time around. Still not up to the quality of Grey's, but maybe it's starting to find its way.

THURSDAY OCT. 4

My Name is Earl (NBC 7:00): The Earl in jail storyline shows no sigh of ending anytime soon as we're introduced to the bumbling warden with his "one month off your prison term" certificates and see Randy get a job at the jail. I'm guessing that Earl will be spreading the wonders of karma throughout the penal system until the first batch of sweeps.

The Office (NBC 8:00): Lots of great stuff in this ep, especially psycho-stalker Kelly's attempts to woo Ryan back, but Michael driving his car into the water was a bit much for me; I prefer it when he comes across as clueless and not functionally retarded.

Survivor (CBS 7:00): Still not really finding anyone to cheer for, although James did earn points when he was complaining about being the only person out there who had apparently had the brains to go by a Barnes & Noble and read up on survival skills beforehand.

Grey's Anatomy (CBS 8:00): Some really great stuff with Bailey in the first two eps of the season, especially her shanghaiing of Meredith for help in the clinic and the exchange between her and Karev after his blunder with the meth-head dad. Right now I'm just waiting for the George/Izzy/Callie triangle to come to a head; hate all of the sneaking around.

MONDAY, OCT 8

how I Met Your Mother (CBS 7:00): I always enjoy the show when it highlights the competitive nature of the guys' friendship, so between the Wii Wimbledon and hunt for The Belt, this was a nice ep for me. Especially liked Barney's attempts at sabotage, his plan to put Ted back into the hunt, and his final "You did. You didn't. He didn't. No, wait, he did!" run. Good stuff.

Big Bang Theory (CBS 7:30): After being only so-so towards the show after the pilot, I find myself pleasantly surprised by how much I'm enjoying it. Loved the WoW bit at the beginning of the ep, and emotionally stunted Sheldon trying to cope with slightly-less stunted Leonard's romantic woes was entertaining. Even better was seeing Sara Gilbert and Johnny Galecki play potential love interests yet again, even if their current characters are about a zillion miles away from Darlene and David.

Two and a Half Men (CBS 8:00): Not much to say about the ep, other than after Robin's restaurant head injury was followed closely by Leonard's possible restaurant concussion on Big Bang Theory, PigPen and I were wondering if it was a theme night on the CBS sitcoms; sadly, Two and a Half Men broke the bleeding-head-in-a-fancy-restaurant streak, even if Charley's blind date did qualify as restaurant carnage of a sort.

Heroes (NBC 8:00): Much like the first season, it's the adventures of Hiro which capture my attention more than anything else. I am intrigued by what the painting means for HRG, and was glad to see Maya actually take some initiative (of sorts), but really, until we get full into the story of this season's Big Bad, it's almost like we're treading water.

Movie Mon. - Studio 60 Syndrome Strikes Set

The TV Set: Indie film about the struggles of a TV producer (David Duchovny) to bring his dream project to life despite the meddling of TV executives (Ioan Gruffudd sporting his own accent for once and a very funny Sigourney Weaver) who absolutely "love" the script, but keep wanting to change it ("Does the brother have to commit suicide? It's just such a downer.") Some funny stuff here and there, but this is one of those films that will probably best be appreciated by those with some knowledge of the inner workings of TV shows and pilot seasons. Plus, it sort of suffers from what I shall be calling Studio 60 syndrome, i.e. everyone constantly talks about how awesome and funny the show within the show is, but every time it's on-screen it only makes you cringe, not laugh. So-so film that falls in the "not sorry I watched but not going to really recommend either" category, despite great performances by the always spectacular Sigourney Weaver and Judy Greer.

Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer: Sequel that manages to improve on the original in some aspects (mainly in having the team utilize their powers) while still falling into several of the same traps (why oh why did they decide to have Doom make bad puns? WHY?!?!?!?!?!) Galactus-as-space-cloud didn't bother me all that much, since I was too busy being bothered by all of the lame jokes. But, all the stuff with the Surfer was cool, and while I question the decision to have Johnny go all Super-Skrull at the end, I have to admit that seeing him wield all of the powers at once yielded some nice visuals. All in all, glad I waited to rent it.

The Film Crew Series: For those of you unaware, Mystery Science Theater 3000 veterans Mike Nelson, Kevin "Tom Servo" Murphy, and Bill "Crow T. Robot" Corbet are up to their old movie-mocking ways again, this time in a series of straight-to-DVD productions under the title of The Film Crew. So far I've watched two productions: Hollywood After Dark (featuring Golden Girl Rue Mclanahan as a stripper) and Killers From Space (featuring some of the dorkiest aliens you've ever seen on film. Oh, and Peter Graves). The silhouettes of Mike and the bots may be missing from the screen, but the snarky comments are flying as fast and furious as ever. If you were ever a fan of MST3K be sure to keep an eye out for The Film Crew; it'll be worth your while.

Yours, Mine, and Ours: Caught most of this remake on cable this weekend; not nearly as bad as I'd feared it would be, although I could have done without all of the "Dennis Quaid slips on something, windmills his arms for 30 seconds before landing face first in messy stuff" scenes. As far as family films go, not too bad; sure, it was occasionally hackneyed and always highly predictable, but it had a good cast and some pretty funny scenes with some of the kids.

Solarbabies: Okay, so I only saw a small portion of this late 80s SF non-classic on one of our movie channels this weekend, but I just had to comment on the fact that it not only starred 80s icons Jason Patric (the older brother in Lost Boys) and Jami Gertz (his vampire girlfriend in same), but also a young Lukas Haas (Witness, Lady in White, Mars Attacks, and the excellent Brick) , James LeGros (Ally McBeal, Scotland PA, Enemy of the State and the excellent Living in Oblivion), Peter DeLuise (son of Dom DeLuise and producer of the Stargate TV series), and, last but not least, Adrian Pasdar (the titular character of Profit and Nathan Petrelli on Heroes) sporting a bit of a Road Warrior-esque mullet.

Fractured Finger Friday - Innocent Bystander

Went in for my latest post-op checkup this morning. Apparently, my wonderfully cooperative body decided to react to the surgery by having more scar tissue build up than usual, which has caused the middle joint of my middle finger (otherwise known as the joint which should not have been effected at all by the surgery) to be much less bendy than it should be. At present, I can't even bend it 90 degrees without grabbing hold and yanking hard with the other hand, and even then it doesn't quite want to make it. After experimenting with similar finger cranking tactics, the doctor declared that what we had here was a case of an innocent bystander being negatively effected. So now I get to go to physical therapy and let them push, pull, yank, tug, mash, bind, and do Dox knows what to my stubborn little finger to get it to behave normally.

Who knows; before the year is up I might be able to make a fist again.

And People Say I Watch Too Much TV . . .

The good news is that I managed to make it through all of last night without any homicide-inducing dreams. Of course, this was largely because the meds I took to combat my allergies wound up making me sleep the sleep of the dead, and after I woke up, called in sick, and fell back into bed to sleep for another four hours this nice side effect had worn off, and I was dropped into a dream wherein I was a member of Veronica Mars' scoobies and we were trying to figure out the case of the smiley face plastic bag killer from last night's premiere of Pushing Daisies. Not quite as stress-inducing as most of my recent dreams -- and a bit more TV-inspired than most to boot -- so it's a step in the right direction, I suppose.

To Sleep, Perchance NOT to Dream

A while back I talked about my dreaming habits, and mentioned that I will go through long periods where I don't remember my dreams with brief periods of vivid dreaming; I am currently in one of those vivid dreaming phases, and I am completely and totally ready for it to stop immediately.

Seriously.

You see, these aren't just my normal*, run of the mill dreams. No, for the past couple of weeks my sleep has been filled with dreams with are intense, intricate, involved, and, most importantly, irritating. Very, very irritating. "Wake up so ticked off that I want to punch somebody in the face" irritating. While the specific details may vary, the gist of the dreams are essentially the same: people around me being combative, obstinate, obtuse, and overall annoying to the point of inducing within me homicidal rage. Yes, if a dream is a wish your heart makes as Cinderella would have us believe, then apparently my heart has a bit of a death wish.

The worst part about it is that thanks to these dreams I don't wake up well-rested and refreshed, but rather tense, angry, and worn down. I've never had such an extended run of untenable dreams, and I'm hoping that once they stop I won't soon have another batch. But most of all I'm hoping that this current dream cycle comes to a sudden end before what's left of my sanity does.

*Normal**
**Yes, that running gag is still going on, although the surplus usage of the word in Dexter, Heroes, and Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer has almost burned the Boys of Benjiman Street out on it . . . almost.

TV Tues - Cap'n Neurotic's Crisis of Infinite Monkeys Denton Meredith Palmer Memorial Celebrity Rabies Awareness Pro-Am Fun Run Race for the Cure

Still a bit behind on TV viewage, due to a full day of activities on Saturday, so no thoughts on the premieres of Journeyman, Grey's Anatomy, Moonlight, or Stargate Atlantis .

MONDAY

Chuck (NBC 7:00): Haven't had a chance to watch last night's ep yet, but as of the pilot this one is in the lead in the "best new show" category. Sure, the bloodthirsty NSA agents required a bit of a suspension of disbelief, but, honestly, so does the whole "secrets downloaded into a guy's brain by email" conceit. Funny script and likable cast; am curious to see how this plays out week to week.

Heroes (NBC 8:00): I sort of wish I'd rewatched Season 1 before this season started, if for no other reason than to keep track of who knows who from where. Couldn't remember who all Ando had had contact with, how many of the Petrellis Parkman had actually met, if Suresh and the Haitian had ever bumped into each other before, etc.

How I Met Your Mother (CBS 7:00): The tramp stamp and Slapcountdown.com made the season premiere worthwhile; Marshall's letter to Lilly was my favorite part of last night's ep.

Big Bang Theory (CBS 7:30): Some potential here, but I'm not sure how much the witty one-liners can make up for the social awkwardness of the characters which makes me uncomfortable in turn.

TUESDAY

Reaper (CW 8:00): A bit torn on this one. On the one hand, I love the cast, and the decision to play the devil as this self-assured, outwardly charming yet inherently cruel and heartless manipulator works remarkably well. On the other hand, despite some laughs here and there, I felt that much of the pilot was forced, but that could have been a result of trying to cram so much exposition and set-up into an hour. Reserving judgment until I see how the next couple of eps shape up.

PREMIERING TONIGHT (Tuesday Oct. 2):

Cavemen (ABC 7:00): You know, while I'm pretty sure this is going to be complete and total car-wreck from beginning to end -- which is kind of appropriate considering where the whole caveman premise started -- I still feel that morbid curiosity which might draw me into actually watching it just so I can make sure that my undying hatred for it is actually well-formed and based in facts.

Carpoolers (ABC 7:30): New sitcom whose previews haven't done much for me, but I'm going to give it a shot just because it has Fred Goss, the brillianns mind behind the late, lamented Sons and Daughters in it.

WEDNESDAY

Back to You (Fox 7:00): I thought the pilot was a little stronger than the second episode, which was a bit too traditional sitcomy in its "must replace dead fish" running gag, but as the fish deaths got more ludicrous, it actually increased my enjoyment. Still on my watch list for the foreseeable future.

Bionic Woman (NBC 8:00): This reimagining of the late 70s series had one thing going for it in the pilot, which was the inclusion of Katee Sackhoff (a.k.a. Starbuck on the new Battlestar Gallactica) as the evil prototype bionic woman; beyond that, I didn't have a lot of sympathy or connection to any of the other characters, with the exception of the OSI (at least, I'm assuming they're going to call it OSI, don't think they ever said for sure) head shrinker. They're going to have to make the new Jamie Sommers a lot more interesting and engaging before the show has a chance to become a must-watch for me. Plus, a lot of the CGI was reeeeeeeeeealy bad. The premise, along with the promise of more badass Katee Sackhoff, has me on board for at least the next couple of eps, but some character tweaking needs to happen, stat.

Private Practice (ABC 8:00): You know, I really enjoyed the Grey's Anatomy episode which set up this spin-off series, so I was a bit surprised at how little I enjoyed the series premiere. I think the constant bickering of the characters turned me off. The talented cast and the fact that Grey's took a little while to find its footing buys this one a couple more shots.

Dirty Sexy Money (ABC 9:00): I enjoyed some of the quirkier moments of the pilot, but too much soap opera folderol for my taste; doubt I'll be watching it again.

PREMIERING TONIGHT (Wednesday Oct 3rd)

Pushing Daisies (ABC 7:00): By far the most anticipated new show of the season for me, and probably the most well reviewed one to boot. Supposed to be smart, funny, and quirky, so it probably won't last, but with Bryan Fuller (creator of Dead Like Me and Wonderfalls, as well as co-executive producer of Heroes) behind the helm I have to give it a shot.

THURSDAY

Survivor (CBS 7:00): So far this season I haven't really found anybody to cheer for; doesn't seem to be an Ozzie or Yau-Man in the bunch. Gotta give props to Frosti for his competitive spirit, though; throwing himself at man-mountain James during the muddy reward challenge bumped him up a few notches in my book.

My Name is Earl (NBC 7:00): Excellent season premiere; loved all of the psycho threats from Glen (played with violent gusto by Ben Foster), and loved Joy's tough love program for Randy. Curious to see how long the Earl-in-prison storyline lasts.

The Office (NBC 8:00): A couple of Michael moments made me very uncomfortable, but those squirm-in-my-seat moments were more than made up for by the Dwight/Angela storyline. Was also fun seeing Ryan reacting to all of Michael's shenanigans. Oh, and if you have a Facebook account, be sure to join the "Meredith Palmer Memorial Celebrity Rabies Awareness Pro-Am Fun Run Race for the Cure" cause; for those of you without Facebook, you can show your support by buying a "Michael Scott's Dunder Mifflin Scranton Meredith Palmer Memorial Celebrity Rabies Awareness Pro-Am Fun Run For The Cure" T-Shirt or "Support the Rabid" bracelet. Remember: if you don't devote time and energy raising money to research a disease for which there's already a cure, who will?

PREMIERES TONIGHT (Thursday, Oct 4)

30 Rock (NBC 7:30): One of the surprises of last season was just how much I enjoyed this show, which seemed to get stronger as the season went on. Tonight we get to see if it falls prey to the Sophomore Slump.

SUNDAY

Dexter (Showtime 8:00): After finally getting a chance to catch the first season of Dexter on DVD last month, the roomies and I were really looking forward to the start of the new season. While I enjoyed the season premiere, the previews for the rest of the season have me a little concerned about the direction the show is headed; not so much with the manhunt directed at Dex, which I could see giving the series some nice tension if handled correctly, but with the weird "Dex joins an AA-style group to combat his serial killing nature" plot, which just left me scratching my head.

Movie Mon. - It's Baaaaaaaaaack.

Yes, it's the return of Movie Mondays, for now, at least; my level of movie watching is much reduced from what it was back when I started blogging, so there are occasionally weeks where I don't get any movies watched at all. Shocking, I know. Anyway, when I do get a chance to watch stuff, I will try to be more diligent about getting my thoughts down so that all of you blog monkeys can read them and think "He liked/hated that movie? What was he smoking?" Anyway, to kick off the return, here's a smattering of reviews of films I've seen since Movie Monday went on extended hiatus.

Severance: British horror flick with a sense of humor about a group of weapons manufacturer workers who get lost on the way to a team-building retreat and find themselves being hunted down.

Two Weeks: Serio-comic look at the final two weeks of life of a cancer-ridden mother of four (Sally Fields) and how her children cope. A well-done little film which rises above the possible syrupy nature of such a tale by imbuing the siblings with a snarky sense of humor; I laughed out loud quite a few times.

Hot Fuzz: Loved this just as much on DVD as I did at the theater. Simon Pegg, Edgar Wright, and Nick Frost need to work together until the end of time; can't wait to see what the next project from these comic masterminds will be.

Pathfinder: Interesting film about an abandoned Viking child (Karl Urban, a.k.a. Vaako in Chronicles of Riddick) raised by a Native American tribe, and then called upon to defend them when his kinsmen return to rape and pillage. Some nice action helps propel the film past moments of "what were they thinking?"

Black Christmas: Remake of 70s slasher film (reviewed here by yours truly) which falls far short of the mark set by the original, much to no one's surprise, I'm sure. It was interesting to see Michelle Trachtenberg (best known as the titular character in Harriet the Spy or as Dawn on Buffy) play a much less perky and much more jaded character than I've seen in the past, but overall, the film's a mess, made even more so by the unbelievable survival abilities of the killers, which stretch credibility even by horror film standards.

Wind Chill: Interesting supernatural thriller about a couple of college students who become stranded on a haunted stretch of road in the middle of a blizzard. Let me spoil one thing for you right now: the two main characters are not, I repeat, not dead throughout the entire film; both Maverick and I were worried that they were playing out that old chestnut (about which I've railed before), and were both relieved to find out that wasn't the case. It takes a while for the supernatural aspects of the film to ramp up, but I so enjoyed the interaction between the main characters that I didn't really mind.

Year of the Dog: Off-beat comedy about a lonely woman (Molly Shannon) who undergoes some life changes after the death of her dog. This one was a bit hard to slog through at times; there were some pretty funny parts (especially those revolving around Shannon's best friend), but also long stretches with little to nothing of interest happening. In the end I'm glad I stuck it out, but not one I'd recommend to most folks.

Primeval: Goofy giant crocodile movie that's never quite sure what it wants to be, swinging wildly from giant monster movie to strident political commentary at a moment's notice. Filled with unbelievably annoying characters, only Orlando Jones made a really positive impression, and even that wasn't enough to get a positive review out of me. And don't even get me started on the horrible CGI. *shudder*

Fracture: Enjoyable thriller about a too-smart-for-his-own-good lawyer (Ryan Gosling) who gets used as a pawn in the machinations of too-smart-for-anybody's-good murderer (Anthony Hopkins). I'm surprised I liked this as much as I did considering that neither Gosling nor Hopkins' characters are all that likable, a result of the script and not the performances, which were top-notch. Oh, and if you've ever wondered to yourself "what exactly does Cap'n Neurotic's cell phone look like?" well this movie is for you, as Gosling not only uses the exact same model of phone as I do, but the phone actually plays a pivotal part in helping him unravel the mystery.

The Lookout: Another chapter in Joseph Gordon-Levitt's quest to completely obliterate that image of him as "that kid from 3rd Rock from the Sun" has him returning to the world of pseudo-noir as a young man dealing with brain damage from a car wreck who is recruited to be the lookout for a bank robbery. Not too many surprises, perhaps, but a solid film with solid acting.

Wild Hogs: Comedy about a group of middle-aged guys with motorcycles who go on a road trip and get into all sorts of hijinks along the way. Not anywhere near as painfully unfunny as I had feared from the previews, which failed to make me laugh at all unless William H. Macy was onscreen. And, as one might suspect from that, most of the highlights of the film for me revolved around Macy's character; both Martin Lawrence and John Travolta's characters grated on my nerves, but Tim Allen was tolerable. All in all, not sorry I saw it, and most people I know liked it a whole lot more than I did, but it just didn't do much for me.

Keeping Things Current

I've been thinking about updating the Cast List and FAQ pages a bit, the former because there have been some new additions to the Singles who really need entries, and the latter because, well, it just hasn't been updated since its creation. Of course, it's not like I'm drowning in a sea of questions which are crying out to be added to the FAQ, so here's my semi-regular call for blog monkey feedback: if you have any burning questions about me, my cast, or the blog in general, please submit them to me* via comments, email, text, phone, IM, telegram, candygram, fax, carrier pigeon, message owl, psychic bond, etc., and I shall do my best to answer them.



*I'm about 99.99999% convinced that I won't receive a single question, meaning either (a) my life is an open book or (b) I'm so danged dull that there's nothing of interest worth asking.

Cue the "We've Heard That Before" Comments

I think it's been a while since I've made a "I'm going to start blogging more regularly, honest, I mean it!" style post, so we're probably about due, huh? Honestly, my well of creativity has been dry for a while; there was a brief upsurgance during the early days of Write in the Thick of It, but the stresses and travails of life soon sucked that right out of me, and after the finger fracturing incident, I didn't feel like writing much of anything. Oh, sure, there might be small bursts of activity here and there, but overall, trying to write anything of substance was akin to trying to argue with The Lovable PigPen: painful, frustrating, and ultimately futile. Of course, the less often I wrote, the less often I felt inspired to write; sort of a "use it or lose it" type of thing. At this point I'm determined to start plugging away at the blogging thing once again, and approach it with a spin on the NaNoWriMo philosophy: write something, anything, no matter how banal or pointless or brief, in the hopes that, the more I write, the more I'll want to write, and the more I want to write, the more inspired my writing will be. My goal for next week is to have something posted every day, even if it's just a little paragraph describing exactly why I haven't written anything of substance. With any luck, I'll get so tired of writing excuses that I'll actually write something mildly entertaining.

No promises, though.

This is a Subliminal Blog Post

Feeling kind of stream-of-consciousness today; I blame warring allergy medications.

Went to the doctor last Wednesday for the latest check-up, and I'm happy to say that I'm am currently without a splint of any kind on my finger. It is taking some getting used to, though; I've become so used to avoiding using that finger while typing that I have to consciously will myself to use it. I'm still not able to bend the middle joint all the way, or the top joint hardly at all, but I'm working on it. Of course, now that I no longer have the splint on, if the lack of bendiness in the fingers result in my accidentally flipping somebody off, they're probably not going to be quite as understanding -- at least until I explain and show them my scars.

A couple of weeks ago Cap'n Shack-Fu's deployment was modified so that he and his supervisor would be rotating between here and OK every two weeks, which was welcome news to The Singles in general, and HyperForce 3000 in particular. And, as I had hoped, once back in town Taskmaster-Fu did indeed make sure that I actually got off my lazy butt and headed to the gym, for which I was thankful. Unfortunately, the Shackster's two week stay in Denton turned into a week and a day as his supervisor became ill and he was sent back to relieve her until she recovers. With luck, the rotation will resume once she's feeling better. In his absence, apparently Cap'n Peanut has appointed himself as interim taskmaster; just minutes ago I received the following text message from him: "This is a subliminal message: you will work out today." He's a sneaky one, that Peanut.

I tell you, as soon as I stop hemorrhaging money due to paying off surgical costs, my first order of business will be going to see an allergist; I've been completely miserable the last couple of weeks, and it's getting really, really old really, really fast. After a weekend filled with constant sneezing and sinus headaches I actually made myself stay home last night instead of going to cheer on PigPen and the FBCD Men's Softball team.

In honor of the Fall season, next Tuesday will see the return of TV Tuesday. In theory, at least. With luck, I won't be experiencing any more strange VCR malfunctions like the one last night that messed up the recording of Chuck and the first 10 minutes of Heroes . Thanks goodness for NBC hosting the episodes online for free.

As long as we're on the subject of new TV shows, I will say that I really enjoyed the new Kelsey Grammer sitcom Back to You (FOX, Wednesday, 7:00), and that the new sitcom The Big Bang Theory (CBS, Monday, 7:30) shows potential. Other new shows I'm planning on trying out this week:

• Chuck (NBC, Mondays, 7:00, pilot available online)
• Journeyman (NBC, Mondays, 9:00, pilot available online)
• Reaper (CW, Tuesday Sept. 25, 8:00)
• Private Practice (ABC, Wednesday, Sept. 26, 8:00)
• Bionic Woman (NBC, Wednesday, Sept. 26, 8:00)
• Moonlight (CBS, Friday, Sept. 28, 8:00)

Of course, the new show I'm most excited about which has garned all sorts of critical awards and looks to be smart, funny, and slightly off-beat and so won't last more than three, four weeks tops, is Pushing Daisies, which will premiere on Wednesday, October 3.

I unfortunately missed out on a b-day party for Cap'n Cluck last Friday which included a game of Balderdash which added a few new words to the group vernacular; apparently, "quop" is the new "mohoohoo," or at least so it seemed to me the next time I was around the group, where it was "quop this" or "quop that" or "do you quop?" Luckily, Maverick had filled me in on the details earlier so I didn't feel too far out of the loop. Still, hate missing out on the genesis of such a wide-spread inside joke.

Apparently, Trouble has decided that my adventures in finger fracturing sounded like tons of fun, and has fractured her thumb, as well as spraining her wrist.

And it looks like the consciousness stream has run dry for the nonce.

My How Time Flies When You're a HyperForcer

When my best bud Cap'n Shack-Fu commented that Monday was the one-year anniversary of his first visit to our class, I was surprised. Part of that was a strange mixture of "how time flies" and "wow, has it only been a year?" but part of it was a result of the fact that whenever I try to tell someone how long I've bee a member of the Singles, I always have to couch it in generalities because, to be honest, I have only the vaguest idea of when my first visit was. I know it was in 2002, because I moved to Denton in 2001, and I'm pretty sure it was towards the end of April, because the in-house visit I got from Freezeout's FAITH team was the last such visit of that FAITH semester, which would usually end then. And then I did my usual "hang around on the outskirts" thing for awhile and didn't become a really regular attender until the end of August or beginning of September which is when the next semseter of FAITH began.

So, with such a hazy memory of my own, I'm always surprised when others have much more concrete recollections. I suppose it's possible that the Shack-man just has a better head for dates than I do, which wouldn't be hard; or, maybe joining our class was such a positive experience that he marked it down in his little Shack-journal for posterity's sake; or, quite possibly, the date of Sept. 17 2006 is seared into his brain forever as the day he was subjected to the rambling world of Cap'n Neurotic and thus made forfeit his very sanity.

I'm leaning towards that last one, myself.

The Very Definition of "Too Much Free Time"

As most blog monkeys should know by now, I am an avid drinker of Coca-Cola Classic, and a strong avoider of Dr. Pepper, a fact that leads to constant arguments with my roomie PigPen. One of my co-workers has recently joined PigPen's side in The Great Cola War, more as a means to mess with me than anything else. What makes me say that? Well, part of it is the fact that she was already taking great pleasure in messing with me by rearranging the action figures decorating my desk and pinning up a book cover guaranteed to trigger my HyperForce 3000 Pavlovian response so it's only natural to see her siding with PigPen as an outgrowth of such behavior, an idea that was pretty much confirmed after I was presented with the following photo-shopped image from her The Lovable PigPen was highly appreciative, and my good pal Cap'n Shack-Fu congratulated me on turning from the dark side.

Of course, the fun didn't stop there. Drunk on creative power, my co-worker's cubicle desecration, I mean, decoration went into full swing: posting certain words right above my monitor
pasting pictures of me on top of my action figures


presenting a framed version of the libelous photoshop


and, the coup de grâce, placing the framed picture in the middle of my action figure display, and turning every single one of them to face it.


And this is but the tip of the iceberg, according to her. I suppose I should take comfort in the fact that, come Monday, I shall be her immediate supervisor and hold her fate in the palm of my hand. Muah-ha-ha-ha-ha!

Two Book Reviews In One Week? The Human Mind Can't Work At Such Speeds!

Three Days to Never by Tim Powers

English Lit professor Frank Marrity and his precocious daughter Daphne find themselves at the center of supernatural espionage after the death of Frank's grandmother Lieserl -- who Daphne has always suspected of being a witch --under strange circumstances during the Harmonic Convergence of 1987 leads two clandestine organizations to their doorstep in search of a powerful metaphysical device somehow connected to both Albert Einstein and Charlie Chaplin. On one side is a occult-focused division of the Mossad, led by the kosher Lepidopt who is cursed with premonitions regarding his own mortality; on the other, the mysterious Vespers, whose main field agent is the blind remote viewer Charlotte Sinclair who is only able to see out of the eyes of others. Connected by a psychic link which has grown incredibly strong following the Convergence, Frank and Daphne must piece together the truth of Lieserl's past while avoiding the murderous Vespers and a strange Shakespeare-quoting apparition referred to in Lieserl's correspondence as "Caliban."

You know, if I ever get around to posting a "Top 10 Authors" list, Tim Powers is going to be right at the top. I love the way he takes real people and historical events and merges them with the fantastic. In On Stranger Tides it was Blackbeard meets voodoo; in Declare it was notorious spy Kim Philby interacting with djinns; in The Stress of Her Regard it was Romantic poets Shelley and Percy Bysshe Shelley being inspired by vampiric lamias; and here we have Albert Einstein and Charlie Chaplin monkeying around with the space-time continuum. Powers excels in taking historical tidbits (Einstein's hair turning white prematurely, Chaplin's lost film, Einstein and Chaplin attending a seance together) and finding a way to turn them into one huge supernatural conspiracy theory. Half the fun of reading a Powers book is seeing how his extrapolations play out. While Three Days to Never may not be my favorite of what some refer to as his "secret history" novels, it's still an entertaining and engaging novel.

Hey, Look, a Book Review!

Darkness of the Light: Book 1 of The Hidden Earth by Peter David

To its original inhabitants it was once known as "Earth," but to the Twelve Races who conquered the planet -- races strikingly similar to creatures from the mythologies of the now nearly extinct "Morts" -- it is known only as The Damned World. Banished to The Damned World for their warlike tendencies -- tendencies barely kept in check by the being known only as The Overseer and his mysterious and deadly servants The Travelers -- each of The Twelve Races struggles to solidify their foothold on the planet which is now their home. In the land of Feend the cyclopean Oculars fight a battle against the blood-sucking Piri; in the city of Perriz a crafty Mandraque plots to unite the five tribes of his reptilian race under his rule with the help of his erratic sister; in water-logged Venets the power-hungry amphibious Merk queen schemes to challenge the power of the Travelers; in the underground realm of the Trulls two royal brothers struggle for supremacy; and in the borderlands of the Mandraques a Mort pleasure slave, freed by the death of her master on the battlefield, is taken in by a motley crew of scavengers who are conscripted by the Ocular king to retrieve the human artifact known as the Orb of Trinity which he believes will save his people, but which instead holds the potential to doom them all.

Darkness of the Light is the first volume in a new SF series by one of my favorite authors. Possibly his most ambitious work so far (in the realm of novels at least), this novel showcases David's ability to take familiar tropes and concepts and weave them into something new. In this case, there's more than a smattering of Fantasy elements, as each of the Twelve Races is based on a mythological creature . . . or, as the conceit of the book would have it, those mythological creatures were based on them. But while the members of the Twelve may have the trappings of Fantasy, there is little "magical" on display outside of the paranormal abilities of the sole human character, the pleasure-slave Jepp who is, of course, more than what she seems. While not as pun-heavy or self-aware as his excellent Sir Apropos of Nothing series, Darkness of the Light does demonstrate David's sense of humor quite often, especially in the passages focusing on the scavengers and the possibly-prophetic-and-probably-crazy Mandraque Norda. But, even thought there is abundant humor, this is not exactly a light-hearted series; there are several main characters who don't survive until the end, adding a degree of suspense that's often lacking in such series.

Darkness of the Light was a well-done introduction to an interesting new world, and should appeal to fans of both fantasy and SF alike.

Fractured Finger Friday - Visual Aids

You would think that getting out of the cast and being able to type with both hands again would have galvanized me into picking up the blogging slack but alas, that has not proven to be the case. Plus, today I have one blue whale sized headache, so don't expect this to be too long.

On Wednesday I was able to take a shower without a bag over my arm for the first time in a month; what a glorious way to start the day. Of course, this was quickly followed by me learning that my insurance company may not be covering as much of my surgery costs as I had originally thought, so, yeah, a nice way to bring me crashing back down to earth there.

While there are many, many reasons I wish my good pal Cap'n Shack-Fu was back here instead of being stationed in OK, right now the reason that tops my list is that if he were here he'd be dragging my fat butt off of the couch and kicking it all the way to the gym. I desperately need motivation to get started working out again after all of my injury-related down time.

Yesterday at work someone was asking me about how my recovery was going, and I mentioned that I was going to have to start doing some minimal physical therapy for the finger. Another coworker overheard this and decided to make something to help me out with that:

Yes, it's a mini-dumbbell, complete with tape to stick it to my finger.

And as long as we're doing visual aids, here are the only pictures available of the Orange Power cast, courtesy of my cell phone.


Loverly, ain't it?

Fractured Finger Friday - Return of the Bird

Got the Orange Power cast removed on Friday, much to the dismay of everyone who had turned making sport of the thing their primary source of amusement. There were very few additions to the list of jokes about the cast since my last post, although at least two people did refer to my crab hand, my uncle made a crack about not being able to put a finger on what was different about me, and PigPen made a big production about asking me "Hey, can you give me a hand? Get it? A Hand!?!?! Muah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! Man, I crack myself up." With the removal of the cast and pins, I am now back to a single finger splint, although one which is a bit more obtrusive in design than my previous splint, which means I will now be flipping people off even more than before.

I did have a bit of a scare when I went in for my appointment. The nurse looked at my chart and said "You're early; this says you don't get that taken off until September 29th." I think my sleep-deprived mind might have snapped if that had been the case.

As happy as I was to lose the cast, my first few days without it have taken some readjustment as I've had to deal with stiff and sore joints as well as painful reminders that I no longer have large quantities of bandages cushioning my recovering finger from my own clumsiness. But at least I can type with both hands again, which is a blessing.

I'm to keep the finger pretty much immobilized for a week, at which point I can start doing minor physical therapy on the joint three times a day for a couple of weeks, at which point I'll go to my next appointment and find out just how successful my healing process has been. Personally, I'm just ready for the time for me to lose my bandages to roll around so I can stop showering with a plastic bag over my hand.

Fractured Finger Friday - Poking Fun

Although my unfortunate injury, subsequent surgery, and long-term recovery have caused a slowdown of blogging, thus plunging you long distance blog monkeys into painful Todd-withdrawal, for those who are in more immediate contact with me my pain and misery have provided endless hours of amusement.

• After my finger was put into a splint to keep the bone from dislocating any more, I was constantly being chastised by Cap’n Peanut, who maintained that as a Sunday School teacher I shouldn’t be flipping people off.
  
  
• Remember how I said that some of the girls had offered to fix me dinner? I should have known there’d be a catch, but I don’t think I would have ever in a million years guessed exactly what that catch would be: my dinner was a meatloaf* in the shape of a finger, complete with crumbled cracker fingernail, aluminum foil stitches, needle and thread, and, the pièce de résistance, red and blue Twizzler veins emerging from a hole at the end. As soon as Cap’n Cluck sends me the pictures she took I’ll be sure to post them.
  
  
• Following my surgery, I had to keep my hand constantly elevated to avoid swelling. That first night as I sat at my computer, arm resting on top of my head, PigPen walked by, stopped, and said “Yes, Todd, you have a question?” He would not be the only one to use this gag; in fact, a week later I would be called on in a meeting at work for the same reason.
  
  
• When it came time to choose a color for my hard cast, I was true to my word to fellow OSU fan PigPen and selected orange. Over the next few days, my friends were glad to inform me of everything my brightly colored burden qualified me for: going hunting without a vest, guiding traffic, guiding airplanes, working in a construction zone, etc. I have also been informed multiple times by co-workers how much it clashes with my work clothes, and every third person to see me asks if it glows in the dark.
  
  
• For reasons I shan’t get into here, last Saturday night I was doing the chicken dance; when it came time to clap my hands, I instead slapped my good hand against my chest which, for some reason, struck PigPen as the funniest thing he’d seen all day, requiring him to then do his impression of me several times at church and lunch the next day.
  
  
• The other day at work one of the student workers walked up, placed his plastic Captain Hook prosthetic on top of the cast, and walked off.
  
  
• Most people are incredulous when they find out that my horribly large and bulky cast is because of a single broken finger, but Zinger’s line is my favorite response so far: “if you’d broken a bone any further down, they probably would have put you in traction.”
  
  
• At the end of church services each week, we are asked to stand and join hands with the person next to us as we sing the closing hymn. This week, Cap’n Shack-Fu was on my right, causing him to exclaim “Great, why do I get the gimp hand?” He then proceeded to grasp me by the thumb.
  
  
• Kookamama’s response to hearing I broke my middle finger: “What, were you flipping too many people off?” Surprisingly, so far she’s the only one to make this particular comment.
  
  
• While my new Orange Power cast leaves my thumb and index finger free, allowing me greater gripping capabilities than the previous arrangement which blocked the index finger off, the bulkiness of the cast still makes certain activities problematic, such as tying my shoes. During my first horribly frustrating attempt to do so, PigPen came to my rescue – of course, as soon as he was done he patted me on the head and started talking to me in the same tone of voice he uses when he talks to his nephews on the phone. “There you go, got your big boy shoes all tied. Who wants a popsicle? Who wants a popsicle?”
  
  There were, of course, no popsicles.
  
  
• While hanging out at Shack-Fu’s house the other night, I had some difficulty getting his recliner to recline, since the lever was on the right side. After helping me with that, my good pal decided to treat me like an invalid, shoving food in my mouth while I was talking to PigPen on the phone**, maniacal and mischievous grin plastered across his sleep-deprived face the whole time***
  
  

Of course, there are numerous examples of times when people ask me if I want to go do something I can’t (“Want to go swimming? Go bowling? Play disc golf”?) or merely laugh heartily at my one handed fumblings (trying to open bottles, trying to sign name, trying to eat, etc.), all of which prompted Cap’n Cluck to thank me heartily on Sunday for breaking my finger and undergoing surgery just to provide them all with ample entertainment.

*When PigPen asked if he could take some with him to work for lunch, I was torn. On the one hand, without him, I wouldn’t have been receiving a home cooked meal from Angel, Cluckity, and others. On the other hand, I wasn’t sure I wanted to support the “if I break one of Todd’s bones I get free food” idea that was sure to result.
**Upon being told that Shack was force feeding me, PigPen began to yell through the phone “Feed him Dr. Pepper! Make him drink Dr. Pepper!” He’s one sick individual, that PigPen.
***The details of why Shack-Fu was back in town and sleep deprived will have to wait until some other time, but suffice it to say that he is beginning to suspect that FEMA is actually just a huge conspiracy calculated to drive him over the edge.

Still Typing One Handed, and It's Still a Pain

Had my post-op check-up on Friday. Good news: everything seems to be healing nicely. Bad news: in order to make sure it keeps healing nicely they put me in a hard cast that reaches almost to my elbow, leaving only my thumb and index finger free. As cumbersome as the cast is, I wouldn't mind it anywhere near as much if it weren't for the metal pins still in my finger which I can often feel getting caught on the gauze under the cast. Kind of hard to concentrate on other things when there's a couple of pieces of metal protruding from your skin, even when you can't see them -- or maybe especially when you can't see them . . . although, actually looking at them while they were changing out casts and removing stitches was more than a bit distracting. Anyone interested in seeing pictures of my mutilated, pin-riddled hand which I quickly took with my camera phone after they took my stitches out can email me; I've opted not to insert them into the blog in deference to the more squeamish blog monkeys out there.

Lots of injury related jokes at my expense to relate, but don't feel like hunt-and-pecking them out right now. With luck I'll be pin-less and cast-less by the middle of next week, and can then resume having to come up with other excuses for not blogging.

Typing One Handed is a Pain

Blogging will still be sparse this week, as my right hand is pretty much useless until at least Friday when I go back in for my post-op check-up, when they will, with luck, put me in a much less obtrusive splint. So, until I can resume my full range of typing motion, try to enjoy the followings survey which I created right before my surgery; feel free to fill it out yourself and post it on your own blog (Diva, consider youself tagged), or in the comments below.

Cap'n Neurotic's Movie Watcher Survey Part 1

Thanks to inspiration from comments by both Cap'n Disaster and PigPen's pal Homeless Bob, I have finally broken down and made my own survey. Naturally, it's about movies; also naturally, I made it too long, and so have split it up into at least three parts, of which this is the first.

1. Where do you like to sit at the theater? Front row, back row, or in between?
With stadium style theaters usually the first row of the second section of seats if for no other reason than to put my feet up on the bar there

2. Foreign language films – subtitles, dubbed, or not at all?
All about the subtitles, most dubbed films drive me crazy

3. Favorite movie watching snack food?
If I’m in the mood for chocolate, Bunch’a’Crunch; if not, Hot Tamales

4. What thing will turn you off of a movie almost immediately?
Humor based on people lying for no logical reason

5. Movie you’re most upset you paid full price for?
Bad Girls

6. Movie you didn’t have to pay full price for, but which was still a complete and total waste of your time?
John Carpenters Vampire$

7. Movie you loathe with the fiery white hot passion of a thousand suns?
Batman and Robin, with the ending of Do the Right Thing ranking a close second

8. What was your first R rated movie?
the first I really recall was Conan the Barbarian; the first one I saw when I was old enough to get in without supervision was Misery

9. What movie did you go to see the most times at the theater?
Toss up between Raiders of the Lost Ark and Return of the Jedi

10. Most overrated movie?
Titanic

11. Most underrated movie?
at the time, The Cable Guy, although it has gathered a following over the years

12. Movie that you always get sucked into when it comes on TV no matter how many times you’ve seen it?
Summer School

13. What special features do you usually watch on DVDs?
almost always watch deleted scenes and gag reels, and will often watch commentaries

14. Widescreen or pan-and-scan?
Ever since Dr. Leff demonstrated how pan-and-scan totally butchered the screen composition and intent of a scene in Rebel Without a Cause, it’s widescreen all the way for me

15. Most disappointing film sequel/prequel?
Star Wars Episodes 1-3, especially 3

16. Biggest pleasant surprise?
Drop Dead Gorgeous which was much funnier and darker than I had anticipated

17. Whose taste in movies is closest to your own?
probably Li’l Random; nobody else I know loves the dark and twisty humor as much as he does

18. Whose taste in movies is furthest from your own?
probably M.J.; anyone who loves SoulPlane as much as she did *has* to be on the opposite end of the movie loving spectrum from me ;)

19. Movie adapted from a book: do you read book or watch movie first?
I will generally read the book first if possible

20. Movie you’re almost ashamed to admit you like?
Beaches

21. Biggest tearjerker?
having never seen any of the acceptable “guy” answers to this question (Brian’s Song, Old Yeller) going to have to go with Steel Magnolias, since even though I knew it was coming, the death made me tear up

22. Scariest movie?
Don’t really get scared by movies on the whole, although walking through a dark parking lot after watching several Friday the 13th films does add to the paranoia a bit

23. Obscure movie you love but which almost nobody else knows of?
Lost Skeleton of Cadavra

24. What’s the biggest factor in making you decide if you want to pay to see a movie in the theater or wait for the DVD?
A movie has to either (a) have awesome special effects, (b) be an atmospheric horror flick which is enhanced by the darkened theater, or (c) be so filled with twists and surprises that I want to see it before it all gets spoiled.

25. What do most of your favorite movies have in common?
Dark, twisty, dialogue-driven (occasionally absurd) humor

Bye Bye, Birdie?

In approximately 4 hours from when I post this I shall be going under the knife to have my broken and dislocated right middle finger repaired; consequently, this may be the last blog post I do for a bit. Granted, Cap'n Bubbles has graciously offered to transcribe my ramblings into blog form for me, but considering how many drafts some of these go through, I can't imagine making anyone suffer through my indecisive proofing.

As part of the surgery preparations, I was instructed multiple times not to eat or drink anything at all after midnight. Then, last night I got a voicemail from the anesthesiologist telling me that since my surgery was in the afternoon, he would let me eat a very light breakfast before 6 AM, and allow me to drink clear liquids up until 7:30. Which was nice, except I didn't wake up until, oh, 7:40 or so, and thus missed out on the generous extension of my food/drink intake timeframe.

And speaking of food, I just got an email from Angel, saying that she and some of the other girls were thinking about me and are planning to bring me dinner tomorrow night, which is cool. Even cooler was the subject line of her email, which is now the subject line of the blog post.

But, although having dinner tomorrow provided tomorrow will be nice, what would be even nicer is actually having food in the house for every other meal for the next few days, so I shall now post this and make a quick run to the store so I can be back home and ready for Squiggly to chauffeur me to the surgeon in Lewisville.

Anarchy at Applebee's: an Evening With Cap'n Bionic, Li'l Weirdo, and Swamp-Fu

Wednesday night my best bud Cap'n Shack-Fu was actually in town for the first time in weeks so the Singles got together at Applebee's for dinner with him before he had to move on again. My roomies, Cap'n Cluck, and I were the first ones to arrive, and as we were being seated I noticed that one of my co-workers* was just a few tables over so I went over to say hi. She and her dinner companion were regaling me with tales of people they knew who had similar injuries to their finger and who had had horrible recovery experiences due to loss of use and the need for multiple surgeries; it was while having these nice uplifting thoughts put into my head that Shack-Fu and Fluffy showed up. Shack-Fu saw me and came running at me full tilt, arms open, crying out "Toooooooooooooooooooodd!!" before nearly knocking me over with his enthusiastic hug. My co-worker would later comment on how unbelievably energetic Shack-Fu was; I told her she had barely seen anything.

While I was happy that we had a big group show up to dinner, the downside of having a large group like that is that you wind up having two or three separate groups operating in their own conversational worlds. Although, at times it's a blessing in disguise; not sure if the restaurant would have been able to handle it if Li'l Random had been seated right next to the rest of HyperForce 3000 instead of at the opposite end of the table where he spent most of the evening alternately entertaining and horrifying the girls around him with his randomness.

Overall, we were at Applebee's for about 2 ¹/₂ hours; luckily, since it was a Wednesday night it wasn't very busy, so we didn't have to feel guilty about monopolizing several tables. At one point I did notice that they had stopped sitting people near us if they could help it, but I'm sure that's just a coincidence, right?

Some highlights of the evening:

• After Li'l Random told me he was going to call me "Bionic," he then began to demonstrate what my bionic finger would be like, making the trademark slow-mo bionic sound effects as he picked things up. PigPen and I simultaneously began to mime a different action with the sound effects, an action I'm sure you can guess if you recall exactly which finger it is that's getting the screws put to it.
  
  
• Fluffy told us that Shack-Fu has a new nickname at his work after he had placed a 'Do Not Disturb, I'm Swamped" sign outside of his office: Swamp Thing.
  
  
  I see the resemblance . . .
  
  
• After Squiggly got a to-go box for her left-over chicken, some of the others decided to decorate it with drawings. Li'l Random drew a fanged face, spiked tale, clawed lags, and segmented stomach to turn the Styrofoam container into a dragon; then, one of the girls grabbed it, drew a bow and eyelashes on it, making it a very feminine dragon. Li'l Random took one look and declared "I shall name you Drusilla!" He then began to work the container to mimic a mouth, and began to woo himself in a falsetto voice. After a minute of this, he put the container down; I took one look at him and said "You were this close to making out with it, weren't you?" He nodded sheepishly, then grabbed the container again. Squiggly proclaimed that he was not making out with her to-go box. He said "Fast-forward to afterward!" and then had Drusilla speak again: "Oh, Li'l Random, you're such a good kisser!" "Oh, Drusilla," he replied, "you taste like chicken."
  
  
• While standing outside of Applebee's, Li'l Random McEvil suddenly grabbed Drusilla from Squiggly, ran down to the other end of the building, set Drusilla on the ground, and then zipped behind the building, cautiously peeking out from behind a bush. When Squiggly refused to give chase and demanded that he return with her food, the Random One crouched down to the ground and began to make Drusilla speak again; it was at this time that the back door of the restaurant opened up and a lady came out, giving Li'l Random a wary look. He bolted straight up and began to stammer out an explanation for his behavior, but the discerning Applebee's customer merely looked at him askance, muttered something, and kept on walking as our entire group died laughing at Li'l Random's embarrassing encounter. After retrieving Drusilla and rejoining the group, Li'l Random informed us what the lady had muttered at him: "Weirdo." And thus, was another nickname added to the list . . .
  

*The one who was the victim of my sweating overshare

Little Bit of This, Little Bit of That

• When I first brought home my X-rays showing the big ol' break in my finger, PigPen's immediate reaction was "Hey, I do good work*." I told him that yes, yes he did, and I would be sure to recommend him to all of my friends.
  
  
• Upon hearing that I was going to have a screw placed in my finger permanently, people usually do one of three things:
  
  1. Make a crack about the fun I'm going to have with metal detectors
  2. Make a pun involving the word "screw"
  3. Make a Six Million Dollar Man reference
  
  Option number three was favored by Zinger ("You going to go for the Six Million Dollar Man thing one body part at a time?"), Li'l Random ("I'm going to start calling you 'Bionic'."), and PigPen ("We can rebuild you; we have the technology. And tell Zinger I'll be preparing the next piece to be replaced soon.")
  
  
• One of the few up-sides to waiting around in doctors' offices for hour s just so that you can spend 5 minutes with the doctor is that you can get a lot of reading done. Almost finished the first book of Gregory Keyes' Kingdoms of Thorn and Bone series, which is shaping up to be just as interesting as his excellent Children of the Changeling books. Guess I should go pay my fines at the Public Library so I can check out the next two, although it might be cheaper to just go and buy copies elsewhere . . .
  
  
• Been trying to decide how I'm going to entertain myself at home while recovering from the surgery; really wishing I hadn't reduced my Netflix subscription now.
  
  
• Another contender for favorite comment on my TMI interview comes courtesy of Flunky, who opines that the overshares listed weren't all that bad considering who they came from. That's a positive comment, right? Right?
  
  
• Allow me a brief minute of comic geekery: While I loved portions of Joss Whedon's Astonishing X-men and thought Grant Morrison's New X-men had some really cool ideas, Ed Brubaker's Rise and Fall of the Shi'ar Empire is by far my favorite X-men story in ages -- not counting Peter David's X-factor run, which is its own private kind of awesome. We no return you to the non-comic-geek portion of your blog
  
  
• I finally tested out the "Watch Now" video on demand feature of Netflix and was pleasently surprised by just how well it worked, even if the film I watched was an incredibly low-budget horror flick shot on DV. Wish I would have tested it out earlier, since I now feel like I've been missing out on some of the value of my Netflix subscription.
  
  
• Favorite quote from the Lost panel at this year's San Diego Comic-Con:

  I would actually argue that were you to go back and look at season one, you would find more acts of violence that our guys committed on each other than violence that the Others committed on them,” Lindelof added. “But our guys are just a lot prettier. So, when Sawyer is like, punching you in the face, you're like ‘More, please. You're just so attractive. Do you want to take your shirt off while the beating continues?' But when Pickett or Friendly is beating you up it's like, ‘Oh this is brutal violence!' So, we promise that as the show moves forward if the violence stays intense it will only be perpetrated by catastrophically good-looking people.

• Not too long ago I finally bit the bullet and arranged my MySpace Top Friends list into something other than strict alphabetical order; of course, this led to PigPen's righteous indignation at being relegated to the #2 slot under Li'l Random. When I pointed out that I'm #17 on his own Top Friends list, he defended my placement there by informing me that every friend listed above me is either family or like family to him, apparently not realizing that (a) my point wasn't that I was bothered by being so low on his list** but rather that in the grand scheme of things he was relatively high on mine and (b) basically telling me "yeah there are 16 people that I care deeply about, and then there's you" wouldn't be all that effective a tactic in convincing me that he should be my #1 friend.
  
  
• It looks like PigPen has managed to postpone starting his new hours another week so that he can finish out the final week of softball season, which has made him happy; I'm sure once he realizes that this will also minimize the time he has to spend with post-surgery, whacked-out-on-pain-meds Todd he'll be even happier.
  
  
• PigPen's girlfriend's*** review of 300 after we watched it Tuesday night: "too much killing." Obviously, she was not the target audience, a fact that was driven home when some dust of the disc made it skip back and play the same sequence of the Spartans killing off wounded men three or four times in a row, making her exclaim "I don't want to see them kill him again!" Women, huh?

*Yes, PigPen was partially responsible for my injury; no it was not on purpose; yes, he expressed genuine remorse over it; no, that does not stop him from continually mocking me and using it as a reminder of what happens when you "mess with the bull"
**No, really -- everyone above me on his list is either kin, the PigPen equivalent of the Parkerites (i.e. friends he's known for years and years ) or his girlfriend, so I can't complain about any of them being ranked above me. Honestly, I'm just happy that he finally moved me above Dane Cook.
***Until I come up with a good nickname for her, it's either call her that or Squiggly's sister. Incidentally, PigPen is #2 on her Top Friends list as well, while she's #16 on his; just thought I'd throw that in there.