Somwhere In-Between the Oscars and the Razzies

MTV has just enabled voting for the 2006 MTV Movie Awards As usual, the nominees are drawn more from the ranks of blockbusters rather than art-houses, but even so, several of them made me shake my head. Let's examine my pain, shall we?

BEST MOVIE
• "The 40-Year-Old Virgin" (Universal Pictures)
• "Batman Begins" (Warner Bros. Pictures)
• "King Kong" (Universal Pictures)
• "Sin City" (Dimension Films)
• "Wedding Crashers" (New Line Cinema)

Probably the only category I have no qualms about; although I didn't love The 40-Year Old Virgin as much as everyone else, I thought it was funny enough for this nomination to make sense. Naturally, I'd much prefer Batman Begins or Sin City to take home the Golden Popcorn, but I'd be cool with any of the above winning.

BEST PERFORMANCE
• Joaquin Phoenix - "Walk the Line" (20th Century Fox)
• Jake Gyllenhaal - "Brokeback Mountain" (Focus Features)
• Rachel McAdams - "Red Eye" (DreamWorks SKG)
• Steve Carell - "The 40-Year-Old Virgin" (Universal Pictures)
• Terrence Howard - "Hustle & Flow" (Paramount Classics)
• Reese Witherspoon - "Walk the Line" (20th Century Fox)

If you'll notice, MTV has done away with the gender separation in the performance category. I was pleasantly surprised to see Rachel McAdams' name in this list; I thought she did a great job in Red Eye, but didn't expect her to be recognized here. I find it interesting that, although it was Heath Ledger who got all the praise and accolades from the mainstream for Brokeback, it's the well-established heartthrob Jake Gyllenhaal who gets the nod here.

BEST COMEDIC PERFORMANCE
• Owen Wilson - "Wedding Crashers" (New Line Cinema)
• Adam Sandler - "The Longest Yard" (Paramount Pictures)
• Steve Carell - "The 40-Year-Old Virgin" (Universal Pictures)
• Tyler Perry - "Madea's Family Reunion" (Lionsgate Films)
• Vince Vaughn - "Wedding Crashers" (New Line Cinema)

Kind of odd that there are no female names here; personally, I think Anna Farris should have gotten a nod for Just Friends in place of Sandler. In fact, I bet I could come up with a list of quite a few performances this past year that were funnier than Sandler's performance in The Longest Yard; the fact that I have yet to see The Longest Yard is beside the point . . .

BEST ON-SCREEN TEAM
• Steve Carell, Paul Rudd, Seth Rogen & Romany Malco - "The 40-Year-Old Virgin" (Universal Pictures)
• Johnny Knoxville, Seann William Scott & Jessica Simpson - "The Dukes of Hazzard" (Warner Bros. Pictures)
• Jessica Alba, Ioan Gruffudd, Chris Evans & Michael Chiklis - "Fantastic Four" (20th Century Fox)
• Daniel Radcliffe, Emma Watson & Rupert Grint - "Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire" (Warner Bros. Pictures)
• Vince Vaughn & Owen Wilson - "Wedding Crashers" (New Line Cinema)

The fact that The Dukes of Hazzard got nominated for anything at all makes my head hurt. That is all.

BEST VILLAIN
• Cillian Murphy - "Batman Begins" (Warner Bros. Pictures)
• Hayden Christensen - "Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith" (20th Century Fox)
• Ralph Fiennes - "Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire" (Warner Bros. Pictures)
• Tilda Swinton - "The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe" (Disney Pictures)
• Tobin Bell - "Saw II" (Lionsgate Films)

My vote went to Cillian, but could have easily gone to Tilda or Ralph instead. I'm not entirely opposed to Tobin's nomination, but think that Hayden's is totally uncalled for; really, his spot should have gone to Lucas instead.

BREAKTHROUGH PERFORMANCE
• Andre "3000" Benjamin - "Four Brothers" (Paramount Pictures)
• Isla Fisher - "Wedding Crashers" (New Line Cinema)
• Nelly - "The Longest Yard" (Paramount Pictures)
• Jennifer Carpenter - "The Exorcism of Emily Rose" (Screen Gems)
• Romany Malco - "The 40-Year-Old Virgin" (Universal Pictures)
• Taraji P. Henson - "Hustle & Flow" (Paramount Classics)

I'm hampered here by not having seen half of the films mentioned; although I was surprised to see her name on the list I'd have to go with Jennifer Carpenter for Emily Rose, because that girl was danged creepy. But still, I feel like there had to have been some better contenders for this one out there somewhere.

BEST HERO
• Christian Bale - "Batman Begins" (Warner Bros. Pictures)
• Jessica Alba - "Fantastic Four" (20th Century Fox)
• Daniel Radcliffe - "Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire" (Warner Bros. Pictures)
• Kate Beckinsale - "Underworld: Evolution" (Screen Gems)
• Ewan McGregor - "Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith" (20th Century Fox)

I'm sorry, but Jessica Alba does not belong on this list; both Chris Evans and Michael Chiklis ran rings around her in the super-hero department in that movie. And before I have to put up with all of the "but she was hot!" comments, yes, Alba was hot, but that's what the next category is for.

SEXIEST PERFORMANCE
• Beyoncé Knowles - "The Pink Panther" (Sony Pictures)
• Jessica Alba - "Sin City" (Dimension Films)
• Jessica Simpson - "The Dukes of Hazzard" (Warner Bros. Pictures)
• Ziyi Zhang - "Memoirs of a Geisha" (Sony Pictures)
• Rob Schneider - "Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo" (Sony Pictures)

Now this category, Alba should win, hands down, although I have a feeling the Rob Schneider nomination could bring it on home.

BEST FIGHT
• Kong vs. the Planes - "King Kong" (Universal Pictures)
• Stephen Chow vs. Axe Gang - "Kung Fu Hustle" (Sony Pictures Classics)
• Angelina Jolie vs. Brad Pitt - "Mr. & Mrs. Smith" (20th Century Fox)
• Ewan McGregor vs. Hayden Christensen - "Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith" (20th Century Fox)

Another list of nominees that makes my head hurt; even the two films that I think deserve to be up here are nominated for the wrong fight scenes. Kong should be Kong vs. dinos, not planes, and there are several scenes in Kung Fu Hustle I prefer to that one.

BEST KISS
• Jake Gyllenhaal & Heath Ledger - "Brokeback Mountain" (Focus Features)
• Taraji P. Henson & Terrence Howard - "Hustle & Flow" (Paramount Classics)
• Anna Faris & Chris Marquette - "Just Friends" (New Line Cinema)
• Angelina Jolie & Brad Pitt - "Mr. & Mrs. Smith" (20th Century Fox)
• Rosario Dawson & Clive Owen - "Sin City" (Dimension Films)

I'm rooting for Anna Faris and Chris Marquette, just because I think they both deserve wider recognition than they usually get.

BEST FRIGHTENED PERFORMANCE
• Rachel Nichols - "The Amityville Horror" (MGM)
• Jennifer Carpenter - "The Exorcism of Emily Rose" (Screen Gems)
• Derek Richardson - "Hostel" (Lionsgate Films)
• Paris Hilton - "House of Wax" (Warner Bros. Pictures)
• Dakota Fanning - "War of the Worlds" (Paramount Pictures)

Personally, I would only nominate Paris Hilton for "most horrifying" . . . not for her performance in House of Wax, just in general.